“Stop Saying You’re Fine!” by Karl Bryan
If you’re in your head you’re behind enemy lines.
That’s not God talking.
If we broadcasted what you say to yourself on a regular basis we’d institutionalize you. You wouldn’t be friends with someone that talked you that way.
It doesn’t matter how you feel… what matters is what you want.
“Look, if I find myself in a situation where I know what I should do but I don’t feel like doing it, I’m going to use a stupid rule.”
Have you ever just felt like sh*t?
In 2008, Mel’s husband’s restaurant got into trouble. They lost their house, their life savings, and almost their marriage.
She was unemployed at the time and found herself in a situation where the alarm would go off and all she could think about were all the things that were wrong with her life.
She rolled over and hit the snooze button.
No doubt we can all relate.
Then while sitting and watching TV she saw a rocket ship launching and thought,…
That’s it, that’s the answer
The next morning she made the decision that she’d rocket out of bed like a rocket ship rather than roll over and hit the snooze button again.
Move so fast that she couldn’t talk herself out of jumping out of bed. And it worked.
She counted backward 5-4-3-2-1… GO.
She subsequently created the 5 Second Rule.
It’s her secret to confidence and beating self-doubt before self-doubt beats her.
It changed her life.
It can change yours.
And… STOP SAYING YOU’RE FINE!
For the past 18 years, Mel Robbins has done nothing but help people get everything they want.
Here are 7 powerful coaching tips from the one and only Mel Robbins:
Confidence Is A Skill
If you were to meet Mel today you’d assume she’s just one of those people blessed with an enormous amount of self-confidence straight out of the womb.
“Confidence is a skill I’ve built over the years by practicing acts of everyday courage.”
If you’ve ever seen the late great Jim Rohn speak he appears polished and confident as heck. When you watched him on stage with 10,000 people in the audience… you’d assume he’s just a natural.
In actual fact, early on he looked like he was going to throw up when the cameras came calling or he jumped on stage.
Steve Jobs was no different and initially fumbled mightily. In the end, you’d see his Apple presentations and think he was born on stage to deliver a new computer device.
Confidence is a skill you’ll earn through your everyday courage.
Hard Tasks First
Creating a morning routine is crucial to your long term success.
If you wake up at 7:00 am your most productive hours will be approximately 7:30 to 10:30 am.
This is weird but there’s documented proof that your brain shrinks as the day moves along and returns to its full size the following morning.
“If you win the morning, you win the day.”
Therefore you should spend the initial hours of your work day pounding through the hard tasks that’ll move you furthest towards your personal and professional goals.
Dial in on your more difficult tasks early in the morning to get them out of the way and subsequently create unstoppable momentum.
Most people start their day off reactive instead of being proactive.
So tomorrow instead of checking your phone and hitting your inbox when your eyes open…. read a blog post, go for a jog, meditate, or write down your goals multiple times.
“The problem isn’t that sh*t happens. The problem is that sh*t happens and people aren’t ready for it.”
You’re no doubt totally overwhelmed with notifications, emails, text messages, phone calls and the like.
It’s easy to wash away an entire day reacting to every notification without really accomplishing anything.
Frankly, it’s a battle to stay focused in this day and age.
One of the major distractions is your phone… here is how to manage it:
- Download ‘Rescue Time’ and manage the time you spend on your phone.
- 30 before 7:30. When you wake up spend 30 minutes working out, meditating, journaling before looking at your phone.
- Don’t be reactionary and look at your phone in the AM. Work on your top priority first thing in the AM and create momentum.
- Do not sleep with your phone in the bedroom.
Distractions aren’t just your phone and social media.
Clutter in your life can be a major bog.
Clean your closet, clean your office, clean your desk and clean your car and watch how much better you feel.
And, your car will start to drive better :o)
Set An End Time For Your Day
It’s very powerful to set an end time for your day.
Might be 7 or 11pm for you…. but once that time comes you’re shut down for the day.
Seldom do people actually “shut off” when they get home. Working often seems like the right thing to do because there’s a never-ending amount to do.
Set a time to stop working and managing kids etc… recharge with your family, a book, in silence, or in front of a good movie.
If you don’t unplug… at some stage you’ll burn out.
You might know this as being sick.
Stop Making Decisions on How You “Feel”
Instead of making decisions based on how “you feel” use the 5-Second Rule and take action!
Does this sound familiar…
“I should clean the house but I don’t feel like it.”
“I should hit the gym but I don’t feel like it.”
“I should finish that project (that could change my life) I’ve been working on but I don’t feel like it.”
We’ve all been there. You’re not alone. Simply count backward 5–4–3–2–1 and do what you need to do!
Your feelings don’t matter. Greatness isn’t easy. Greatness isn’t about how you feel.
Greatness is about what you do!
Avoid Destructive Procrastination
“Procrastination is not a form of laziness. It’s a coping mechanism for stress.”
Procrastination is about “feeling good in this moment” and enjoying a little stress relief.
Procrastination to complete the project, start the business, to call your family, is not about avoidance. It’s about avoiding stress.
Instead of hitting Instagram and or Facebook for another dopamine fix… use the 5-Second Rule to get yourself moving!
There Will Never Be a Right Time
You have two sides to your brain.
- Emergency Brake.
Quit waiting. There will never be a right time to do anything great.
- Finish the project
- Tell your family you love them.
- Start your dream business.
- Go to the gym today. Not next week.
There will never be a right time to do the big things in life.
The more frequent you do things the stronger you will become.
The real F word is “Fine.” The chances of you being born are 1 in 400 trillion. You’re not fine, you’re fantastic!
You have life-changing ideas for a reason.
7 bullet-proof coaching tips from none other than Mel Robbins. She’s an inspiration and one to watch for sure.
Her Ted Talk is pure gold!
Lastly and importantly forgive yourself for procrastinating (we all do it) and not accomplishing as much as you had hoped to date.
Use your new ritual to push through and accomplish all your hopes and dreams.
5 – 4 – 3 – 2 – 1
Karl Bryan gets clients for Business Coaches...period. He is the editor of The Six Figure Coach Magazine and Chairman of Leader Publishing Worldwide, home of the largest private community of Business Coaches (24 countries and counting) in the world.
His goal is straight forward… to help serious coaches/consultants get more clients and to start using the internet effectively.
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